Sunday, February 19, 2012

My Rules for Life

A lot of times people ask me, "Kujo, how come you so happy all the time?" (Disclaimer: no one ever really asks me this) I actually only have a few simple rules for life that keep me rooted.

1. Don't be so serious. I am always amused when I see people running around texting, talking, twittering, and various other t's that apparently require their immediate and urgent attention. People take so many things seriously that really shouldn't be. I've never seen any proof that life is meant to be taken seriously, and until I do, I'm just going to lie back and chill.

2. Do the things you like. If you don't like what you're doing, ask yourself why you're doing it. If you don't know why you're doing it, then stop. If you don't like why you're doing it,  then you need to reevaluate your life decisions. If you're doing it in pursuit of a greater goal that you do like, then keep that goal in mind and focus on that.

3. Smile! It only takes a single candle to fight back the darkness.

4. Pick your relationships wisely. You don't want to be around people that are causing you unhappiness or holding you back. Special corollary for those special someones who have dumped or rejected you (since I have much experience with that): When you've been dumped, the best revenge is to live life to your fullest. Become the best person you could possibly be. Do the things you've only dreamed of doing. Make her regret it, not you.

5. Spoiler alert: You're going to die someday. Morbid? Yes, but until you realize that fact you risk wasting your life on things that you don't care about. Life is not a race! You don't want to get to the end, look back and say "Well, that was a waste of time." No one's keeping score, so lighten up and enjoy the ride. :)

Sunday, February 5, 2012

The Perfection Trap

When you are depressed, it can be very easy to fall into a trap of obsessing over every little mistake you make. This can make it very difficult to be happy. This is not helped by marketing campaigns that teach us that we can only be happy if we have the perfect job, the perfect girlfriend, the perfect car. Of course, depressed or otherwise, no one is perfect and it can be a tremendous waste of time trying to be.

So how can you avoid feeling like you need to be perfect? There are some books out there that you can look at. One that helped me a lot is When Perfect Isn't Good Enough. It helped me realize that I was spending too much time wanting things to be better than they were, instead of accepting that sometimes things just aren't going to work out.

One thing that also helps is to keep things in perspective. Are people really going to notice a small stain on my pants? Is that extra point on homework really going to affect my grade that much? Sometimes you do need to fix things, but you may be surprised at how much better you feel when you stop sweating the small stuff. This doesn't mean you should drastically lower your standards. It just means that perfection is extremely difficult and you are probably better off letting it be. It's one thing to always want to go the extra mile, but it's quite another to beat yourself up over not being perfect.

Realize that perfection will not bring you happiness and then you will know that it's only by embracing our imperfections that we can be truly happy.